Week Three, Four and Five YPDTS

I apologize that I have not been more thorough with my blog writing for the last few weeks, but with a broken computer and a trip down to Albuquerque I have struggled to be able to make time and find a way to be writing. I have had an amazing last few weeks though and I feel like everyday almost I would have been able to write something exciting which is so cool that God is working in us so much. Week three was one that changed my life. We had a speaker named Jeff Pratt who was amazing and had a gift from God to make the Holy Spirit so present to each of us that it was impossible not to feel him working inside you. He was speaking on the Father-heart of God, which is something that I have often struggled to see God as, but after watching videos, hearing scripture and his words, I am working on an intimate relationship with my heavenly Father who is un-like any other. Mr. Pratt spoke of bricks around our heart that created a wall to separate us from God and one day we each had 45 minutes to spend alone with the Lord so he could tell us what those were. I have found that I have many, but God placed on my heart over and over that I need to let go of wanting to please man and have attention from the people around me. His attention is what satisfies and is unchanging, but unfortunately I struggle with living for man. The Lord equipped me with courage beyond anything I have ever experienced before though because when he called us to share with our class what we were struggling with, full of tears I told my classmates. It was an amazing thing and I have found that there is extreme importance in sharing with at least one other person what is going on within you, because the enemy loves us to keep secrets in our hearts and keep ourselves full of condemnation. Also amongst the crazy intensity of this week, we had a lot of fun living in community. I became the resident hairdresser and cut a few girls hair, like legit cut and then died a boys hair from bleach blonde to black!! It was really fun though and I know it's different than normal communal living, but I can see why it is so fun. This week was also the start to me really getting involved in intercession. Since before I came here I didn't really think that God talked to people directly, it was hard for me, but this week I felt a lot from God and that he was giving me things to tell the group out of obedience. As the weeks have gone on, it has gotten much more specific and personal with God and I. This was also an intense week at kingdom night. This is where we go down into Denver and do street evangelism. Though I wasn't able to see someone choose Christ as their Saviour, I was able to have conversations and pray for different people which were really cool and new for me. People have also been prophesying over me that Evangelism is something that the Lord is calling me to and that he has gifted me in this area if I begin to trust him and value what he thinks over what the world thinks. Overall this was a pretty awesome week. The only prayer requests I ask for are for my friends here who don't have their outreach money yet and for the nightmares that I have been having quite regularly.
Week Four:
The honeymoon phase is over. Though there is not a lot of fighting or anything, there is definately a more real dimension to all of us and we are starting to notice that "bad" in each other as well as the good, which is cool because we are able to grow more out of it and love each other more wholly. I also had a creative project due, which was super stressful for me since we were the first group to present and I didn't know what to expect, but it went well and now I couldn't be more thankful that it is over so that I can just spend time working on my assignments which makes life a little less stressful for me. This week's corporate intercession was also aweomse, because our group was split between Egypt and Sudan, so we decided to pray for both countries and we ended up finding out they are in strife with much of Northern Africa over a monopoly on the Nile! It's really cool how God put that all together for us and that is what I will be praying for every monday with my intercession group, so if you would be interested in praying for that too, it would be greatly appreciated. That same day we were also able to go to a pumpkin patch and pick out pumpkins to carve which I'm super excited about! I have relaized here how much I love halloween which is weird, but costumes and such are extremely enjoyable for me. We were able to help out with a kids carnival at the chuch I am attending here last night, and it was nice to see the simple joy that children have and I feel like God is offering that to us all of the time, so it makes me more inspired to live for him with joy from him. The rest of this week was relationship week which was something good for me to hear I think, especially since I'm not pursuing a relationship right now. There is a lot of biblical suggestions on relationships and it's really interesting to look at a relationship as something that is honoring to God and not only ourselves and each other. It wasn't so much an intense week like the one that I had before, but I think that it will be something that is quite helpful when I decide to pursue a relationship again. This week was one that I struggled to keep my chin up and have a good attitude about what was going on in my life, but when I headed down to the base I was encouraged by a guy that I had never really talked to before and I just saw how amazing it is to have a fellowship group that is so comfortable and focused on loving like Christ does. It is something that I need to work on and try to bring home with me.
Week Five:
This last week. This is the most fresh one in my mind so I'm sorry about the last two weeks looking more like a journal entry than a blog, but I did go through my journal to try to remember the little details that made those weeks really significant for me. But, this week we were able to go down to Albuquerque from Sunday to Thursday and minister in a jail, womens halfway house and homeless/battered womens shelter. The Lord worked in us and me so much and though we were still in America, I felt that I was exposed to something I had never let myself experience before. I spent the first two days in the jail and though it was minimum security, there were many people who were anxious and felt in danger, God protected me from this feeling though which was amazing and I was able to be so excited everyday going in. It proved to be amazing too. We spent about an hour in pods of around 50 or more people. Here we did the dramas we had learned and just spent time talking to any of the inamtes who were interested in prayer, accepting Jesus as their Saviour or just talking to us and being able to learn about each other. The first day was so encouraging to me and the men that I met there were such real people and it was obvious that some of them had just made a mistake like many of us had, but got caught in the process of it. I think it was good for me to see how real every person there was and I struggle with praying with others, but I was able to pray for many guys that day and just talk with them about their lives and what God has done in mine. The second pod that I went to, a man seeked me out right away and asked me if I could pray with him about accepting the Lord to be his Saviour for the first time ever! I honestly got so excited I think I missed about half of the salvation prayer, but there were other guys who already knew the Lord and I was able to give him a bible and there were reading calendars that were passed out to help with how to read the bible and make sense of what it all means and what God wants for us. I talked and prayed with a lot more guys and I know that a lot of them were just excited to be able to see a girl for the first time in a while, I was blind to eyes and words of lust and the Lord just filled me with love that has never been so present in my life before. It was amazing! Finally, our last pod was one that was called "God's pod" and it was one that we werent' supposed to be able to go into, but the Lord provided and we were able to go in. All of these men were more dedicated to the Lord than myself and many of the people that I have met who are following the Lord. Unlike any of the other pods, they were lined up all around the outskirts of the courtyard area by their cells and were completely silent when we walked in. Every other pod we were subjected to cat calls, loud games and conversations and many men would not even stop to look at what we were doing, but all of these guys were so respectful of us and even brought us seats to sit on. I have never been treated with so much respect in my life and it was in a jail, so cool. But in this pod we did our dramas and talked with the men for a bit, then they sat us down and sang, rapped and one man sang acapella for us. It was amazing! These men were so talented it was crazy and the rap was something that was divinely blessed and the man that sang acapella had never performed for anyone before us, which was so cool. The other inmates told me that they had never heard him sing before and it was so cool that God called him to share that with us and they prayed for us and told us we would continually be in their prayers and this whole time I had the biggest smile on my face ever. I was actually in a little bit of pain, but I couldn't stop smiling! It was joy that was beyond what I could ever create for myself. Then the next day we went out to the jail again and it was another day full of encouragement. In the last pod Temp, our leader, gave his testimony and an alter call. He asked the men to be completely open about this if they decided that they wanted to follow God to put their hands up in front of everyone, honestly over 30 people put their hands up and even after Temp explained it wasn't an easy life even more guys put their hands up. I was able to pray with so many men and hand out more bibles than I have ever seen in my life. There was a group of men who prayed for us in that pod also, and there was so much passion in their prayer that I couldn't help smiling again. In this pod there were two men with 666 tattoo'd on their forhead and arm. There was a lot of spiritual warfare going on there and I could tell that they were so full of hate the whole time, but the Lord worked through it and the Holy Spirits presence drown any presence the enemy could have created. The whole time that we were in the jail for both days, I realized that I was a prayer warrior in stressful situations. That pod, required me to spend so much time in prayer, but it was cool because it's power was very obvious, so please be praying for this jail, because God moved so much in there those three days. The next day we were able to go to the homeless shelter and it was an extremely depressing place, but the joy of playing with the kids there was amazing and changed the whole atmposphere of the place. Being able to serve the people, talk with them and just play with the kids was something I will never forget and I'm sorry that I wrote such a novel but I think that I will end it here and the next few will nice and short so that it doesn't take you a year to read them again. Thank you for your support and the prayer, please continue to pray for us! I love you and miss you and pray that the Lord is moving in you continually.

Week Two YPDTS

I think I must have changed into a entirely new person since I left home because this week I BY CHOICE woke up at 4:45 am to go on a three hour hike beginning at 5am. I'm pretty sure that I have never in my life have had motivation to do something remotely physical ha, but reaching the top was the most amazing thing. We decided to start so early so that we could see the sunrise between the peak of two higher mountains the the top of the one that we were on and singing songs of praise, while the sun rose over the most beautiful creation has sprouted a new passion in me. I have realized how much hard work pays off and believe me, climbing a mountain in pitch black is something of a struggle, but the Lord blesses his faithful servant, even when their actions are directed entirely towards him. I have been reminded of the difference between special and general revelation this week also, and never before have I appreciated general revalation so much. I also experienced his pleasure in bringing his creation joy while searching for a small purple flower that had brought be joy in the last few days whenever I would pass it. As I was reading the Word, I was trying to find this little flower everywhere and I couldn't seem to find it in all the places that I thought I recognized from before, so I settled on a fallen tree with beautiful needs and branches overlaying each other. When I sat on the trunk admiring the auburn needs, one small, purple flower had weaved through the branches and stared right at me. I fell in love with the Lord all over again and realized how much joy he finds in pleasing his favorite creation. God is good.
This week was something much different than last weeks adventures. It was the first week of classes and school like experience and again I feel like I have known the people around me for a life time, but each day goes by so quickly I am learning that I need to appreciate every day as its own, because they go by so fast. Our speaker this week spoke on the character and nature of God and I am reminded through each characteristic that God is so worthy of our praise. Not only have I been able to spend a lot of time in his theory I have also for the first time experienced his personal messages! I was so excited because everyone here seems to have a back and forth conversation with the Lord and I have never had that before, but this week in our time of intercessiong the Lord blessed me with seeing his will and putting  his will on my heart. God's voice is beautiful and perfect, I am shocked that in my former years I wasn't searching for this, because now that I know what it's like, I don't ever want to lose it. The Lord is definately making his presence known in this place even through our relationships with each other and I am so thankful that he is our Saviour and that he gave us the absolute best there is to offer, himself/the Son Jesus Christ.

2 Peter 2:19(b) "..for man is slave to whatever has mastered him."

Week One YPDTS

Week one of YPDTS is now complete and it feels like I have been here for a month and a day all at the same time. The Lord has blessed me with amazing people to fellowship with and being around a small group of people so intensely living for God has been extremely benificial for me already. Not that I don't have amazing fellowship at home, but being in a place where focus is on the Lord number one and everything else second, has allowed for a breath of life to once again flow into me. We have spent most of the week in times of bonding and put in situations where we either have to get to each other really quick or be awkward and so far there has been nothing negative I can report about the way people are interacting. I value being able to observe how others follow Christ and espcially being in an enviroment where dating and marriage are not number one on everyones minds. This has allowed for comfort and ease in worship and other aspects of living in such close community. We were ableto clime on of the many beautiful mountains earlier in the week in Estes park and a group of us ended up taking an unplanned, extremely difficult offroading detour. With the heat (praise Jesus!) and the quite steep, rugged terain I didn't even give myself the energy to look around, but when we were stopped and told to turn around, the view was idyllic and the whole trip and extra effort was worth it for once chance to see how amazing God's creation is. This is an example of what has been going on this week, but we have had extremely intense worship times that God has used to moved so many people already and being able to go to church with a new community was nice as well just to see how other people praise and worship the Lord. I have found myself taking comfort in knowing that  God is going to be my only Rock and stability in this next five month adventure but I am blessed with the people he has put around me for guidance. I am struggling with the type of identity that I need to pursue to be a follower of Christ and hearing and being able to distinguish his voice from the other voices going on in my head. Though I am not so good at this yet, I have felt and been enlightened of my immense authority to rebuke Satan out of my life and by being Gods child, he will protect me! Well this was only week one, so I can imagine that the transforming that is going to happen in the next while is going to be crazy! But I am excited to take you all along with me and let you see a bit of how God is working in me. I am encouraged to hear from home and I miss and love you all, but this is part of me learning how to take up my cross daily and follow Christ. I appreciate your support and prayers, I am definatley going to need them!!! as well as everyone here at eagle rock and YWAM around the world.
Love you xo